COVID-19 has caused extreme disruption to most of us, however my life hasn’t really changed. Since developing Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) in May 2016 I have spent the majority of that time in isolation at home, with limited social contact and doubts about my future. It’s not an easy situation for any of us to deal with for a long period of time, but I have definitely gained some wisdom over the past few years on how to make it not only bearable but often enjoyable too. The hardest part for me has been the mental side of it, the uncertainty of the future combined with being by yourself with too much time to think, can leave me swaying between anxiety and depression but also numbness. Feeling mentally sluggish, trapped and fed up can also become ‘normal’. Often we can’t change how we feel, but we can choose how we act in response to our feelings. Here are a few practical tips that have helped me to enjoy myself in the midst the struggle of being isolated, I hope they may help those of you who are finding the lockdown particularly difficult. 

1. Create a varied routine:

Give your days/weeks a rhythm, it will help them feel less endless and help you feel more motivated. We may enjoy slobbing around for a while but we really all crave order in our lives too. Try to mix it up though so it’s not the same day after day, plan different activities for different days. 

2. Set goals:

Achieving things feels good, so set some small goals every day – try to get a balance between chores and leisure/fun activities too. Being very limited by my energy in regard to what I can achieve, means I have to really appreciate the small things I can do and try to shift my focus away from what I can’t do, otherwise I can find myself feeling worthless. A lot of us have our personal worth tied up with what we can achieve, I have had to learn and accept I am enough simply because I am, not because of what I do. Show yourself some compassion, don’t overstretch yourself and feel the need to fill every ounce of time just because you feel you ought.

3. Get creative:

Doing something creative (e.g. art, craft, cooking, writing etc) is an easy way to stimulate your brain and feel more alive. It brings you back to yourself again and simple art/craft especially can have the same positive effect on the brain as meditating. I started doing card-making quite soon after I became ill and it has been such a massive help to me, particularly my mental health. When doing craft I can only focus on what’s in front of me and am forced to forget all the swirl of the crisis my life seems stuck in, and find peace in the storm. Producing something you are proud of at the end of it also feels very satisfying.

4. Get some fresh air and go outside:

Try to go for a walk or spend some time in the garden. Sitting in the garden is so relaxing and I know the small change of scene brings a glimpse of relief to my soul.

5. Intentionally connect with people around you:

Messaging alone doesn’t satisfy our social needs. Plan a few phone calls or arrange to hang out at home with someone you live with – watch something on TV or simply have a cup of tea together. Make the most of what you can do rather than moping about what you can’t do.

6. Have things to look forward to:

It can be as simple as buying your favourite food and then planning when you’re going to eat it. Keep it simple and achievable. It’s an easy was to lift your spirits and stop focusing so much what is going on around you. I use this technique particularly on days when time feels endless, usually on a Monday when I am struggling to face another Groundhog week. I have to force myself to take my eyes off the seemingly infinite stretch of time before me, where nothing looks like changing, instead just focusing on this one day. Find one or two things you can look forward to and write it somewhere you can see it and just centre on today, letting the unknown future blur before you.

7. Think about what you are thinking about:

Spending hours looking at news/social media, filling yourself with fear, isn’t going to help your mental wellbeing. Try to limit this kind of input, especially if you notice what you read swirling round and round in your mind. Let it go. Worrying can’t change the outcome of any situation and ‘knowing’ all about it can’t protect you either. Settle it within yourself that, although you don’t know what tomorrow will bring, you are resilient, and you are going to make it through. Take one day at a time. If you notice your thoughts are racing, try some simple meditation, like the Headspace app, to slow things down.

8. Choose a positive attitude:

We have to choose to believe for the best no matter what adversity we face. Negativity is so heavy and burdensome, whereas re-framing things in a positive way lets the light in and allows hope to rise. If you want some inspiration on how to be positive, just listen to Joel Osteen’s podcast. Choosing to be positive doesn’t mean you fake happiness. I still feel negative feelings, I don’t pretend they don’t exist. I can acknowledge how I feel in my struggle and still choose to believe things will turn out good in the end.

9. Take time for self-care:

See this extra time at home as an opportunity to create some new, good habits, particularly in the area of self-care. Love your body, soul and spirit. Try a new workout on Youtube, find a new hobby, try doing some meditation or make some simple, healthy changes to your diet. Then when normal, busy life resumes, the good habits you implement now could help you feel more alive and energised in the long-term. A lot of the good habits and wisdom I am learning now, I try to see it as building blocks for my future and that good will come because of it, although its hard to go through now. 

Getting used to a more restful life in the slow lane can take time, especially when you have been used to hustling along. But it is a chance to see life from a different perspective and gain wisdom that we can carry with us beyond our crisis. However, not knowing when the difficulty will end and when ‘normality’ will return can make it hard to rest and have peace. A certain degree of acceptance of the unknown is required in these times, a letting go of our need for certainty. It is a reminder we are not in control as much as we would like to think we are, which scares us. But we can find peace here, out of control, in the midst of the unknown. Life goes on and we must learn to enjoy life for what it is, instead of trying to make life as we think it should be. I hope you will not just survive but thrive in this lockdown, but also appreciate life on the other side all the more because of this experience. The likelihood is the COVID-19 crisis will end a lot sooner than my current health crisis, so spare a thought for those of us whose lives remain disrupted and may once again feel left behind as the world returns to normality, yet we remain stuck because of chronic illness and personal difficulties.

“I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
Psalm 91:2